Pope, Boss, Fraud, Pastor

"It’s not about me…"

This is the resounding thought in my mind when I study and deliver the Word of God. To do so, I actively avoid inserting my life, actions, or family (they are thankful for this) into illustrations. But on occasion, I come to an impasse where my experiences and the text collide.

A few Sundays ago, in the text of 1 Peter 2, I shared my experiences on trying to suffer well under unjust accusations. For those that missed the illustration, I’ll recount it here briefly.

I had arrived as the new pastor. I am completely different in skill and personality from the last pastor. It was not long before a brother in Christ called me into a meeting and moved through some difficult conversations about concerns that he had. Some of those concerns were questions of integrity, genuine love for the saints, a heart for missions, and a few other things.

Prior to the meeting, I had read through 1 Peter 2 and determined to:

• Hear and remain silent.

• Not seek to defend myself.

• Listen carefully.

• Entrust myself to God who judges justly.

This was beyond a mere difficulty because of my habit of having reasons for my actions and my own sinful heart, which screamed, "Defend yourself."

I left that meeting acutely aware of God’s love, seeking kernels of truth in the conversations, and delighting that Jesus died to save sinners. What a time to experience God’s Word and follow the path of our Savior in a light and momentary affliction.

After sharing this illustration in the recent sermon, I did not anticipate the response from others across the range of thoughts our church members had. Some were shocked by the truth and had sincere concerns for my heart and faith. Others were wondering how they would move through a similar situation and see the reasons to not defend themselves.

Finally, one person said something that I had not considered:

"I just thought everyone spoke to you and treated you like I do."

Here is where I want to hang out for a moment and share some of my own perspectives—from pastor to members.

Does everyone treat or speak to me the same way as others?

No.

I receive a multifaceted response from people with various personalities and backgrounds. I’m not sure how best to categorize them all, but I’ll try and then give some thoughts.

After considering the responses, I began to generalize them into a few categories.

Pope!

It is true that some people treat me or speak to me as an untouchable, infallible being that sits next to God in a palace.

To be clear, I don’t believe the pope is infallible or untouchable, but that is the general idea for some in the church. Nerves spill over for them, and they seem to fidget with their hands as they speak. They heap up loftier speech or begin to confess sin in rapid succession. They desire me to be more than I can be and, at the same time, overlook my own failures and wrestles with sin.

Thoughts

I am not a pope in this way (fun fact—the pope is not even like this).

I am just a man like many others. I’ve wrestled with many of the same sins as our members and still seek to kill other sins currently.

More than your lofty speech or timid approach, I want to know you.

Let's go to Top Golf.

Come into my home and watch me love my family over a meal.

Resist the idea that I’m much more than a pilgrim with you on the road to the glory of heaven.

Boss!

People see the title "Lead Pastor" and believe that I’m in complete control of all things related to the church.

Some assume that the wall paint was selected by me. If they have an issue with another staff member of the church, they come to me so that I will bear a hammer and crush the issue.

I’ve had a member say,

"I’m here so you will crack the whip and get the others into line."

Many believe that all the decisions of the church flow from me as boss, and everyone scurries to accomplish those commands.

Thoughts

I have always led in a plurality of elders.

My title does not remove me from understanding that I don’t have all the best ideas or plans. I need help often from others and allow much of the church to operate without my direct oversight. I trust the staff that God has brought together.

Although my position at the church does increase the weight of my words in meetings or planning, it is my job to ensure that I speak less and last.

Real leadership comes from walking alongside others—even when you don’t get your way—still celebrating the faithfulness of God among those you love.

Fraud!

Growing in our society is the distrust people have for clergy and those in authority.

Some of that is based on verified abuses across the globe by those in positions of authority in the local church. Others believe that faith is a sham and pastors are preying upon the fears of weak-minded people to gain their money.

Even members have suspicions of ungodliness in the life of their pastor, looking for cracks in the armor, so to speak.

Thoughts

I believe the gospel completely and function out of that belief to encourage others to consider that life on earth was planned by the infinite God of the universe.

I could not in good conscience preach and lead the way I do and not believe the gospel.

Honestly, many pastors have completed postgraduate work to the tune of 90 credit hours. Additionally, they will likely take lesser pay than other similar jobs outside of vocational ministry.

Finally, the hours, crisis management, attacks, and other weights could make other jobs—for the sake of a paycheck—far more appealing.

Others and I continue in pastoral ministry because of God’s compelling call.

We delight in obeying our Lord, even at cost.

Every pastor I know (myself chief among them) is a sinner under the grace and mercy of Jesus.

Cracks abound all around until we reach glory.

Customer Service Representative!

We live in a consumer-driven culture.

People and businesses are competing for our time or money. The "customer is always right" mentality has invaded our hearts and even some churches.

Churches have been turned into places to make people happy rather than holy.

We are all prone to this kind of thinking.

Therefore, the pastor’s job becomes keeping the tithing customer happy.

They must field my complaints with resolution.

They must keep the sermons short and uplifting.

They should provide me with the type of experience I have paid for.

Now, this is the smallest percentage of people who have this attitude, but it exists.

Thoughts

The best thing a pastor can offer anyone is displaying the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ, helping each member fall more and more in love with the God of the universe.

Pastors aren’t selling an experience or product.

They desire to see people enjoy the Lord.

The mutual service that member and shepherd give is how we grow in Christ and display His glory to a lost and dying world.

Both are servants—not customers and employees—but brothers and sisters in Christ.

Pastor!

The highest compliment someone can give their pastor is to introduce him and say,

"This is my pastor."

Pastors are ordinary people who desire to guide and care for the people under their charge.

Members seek to encourage and pray for me and my family.

Faithful saints want me to preach the Word clearly and weep with them occasionally.

Those that approach me in this manner have a keen understanding of my sinfulness, God’s gift, my heart, and a desire to serve.

Here, much grace and biblical understanding flow into our conversations over lost family members or a crumbling culture.

Thoughts

This is who I am.

This is the most helpful way to have conversations and interactions.

Treating me and others as ordinary believers tasked with different roles—and as examples on the path to Christ in glory—is refreshing.

Giving and taking as we have need in the work of God’s kingdom advance is the best way to enjoy one another.

Invite pastors out to eat and into your lives with no veiled attempt to curry their favor or prove one’s holiness.

I am thankful for these interactions that encourage my faith.

A Final Question

How do you approach your pastor(s)?